I'm not being insensitive. I was just really focused on why the dude in P90X who has an artificial leg had a band-aid on it. At first when the Guy Who Can't Seem to Stop Talking said something about the dude in the front only having one leg, I thought he was joking, but then I focused in and noticed it was definitely kinda shiny and didn't have leg hair but that's when I was perplexed by the band-aid. Any ideas?
Okay, so I did the first day of P90X yesterday, and I didn't die but it was only because I couldn't do most of what they were doing. It was almost entirely push-ups (20 different variations) and pull-ups (the same). So I did what I could, and I could definitely feel it today, but I need a LOT of work on upper body. I will not make it across one rung of the monkey-bars-from-hell in the Tough Mudder in my current (weak) state. Not sure when upper body comes back in the rotation--I think I do it once a week for the first three weeks. Hopefully, next Monday will be better.
Today was Plyometrics and you know, it wasn't terrible . Sure, I wasn't jumping as high as those folks, not even as high as the guy with the band-aided artificial leg, but I was jumping. I didn't stop except during designated water breaks. Well, wait a minute, I did get a little sidetracked when he hit the sporty section towards the end. We were supposed to pitch and catch an imaginary ball, and then shoot baskets and then do some footbally drill thingie, and because I've never been sporty (ie, coordinated), it took me awhile to get my bearings on that one. Brought back bad memories from middle school P.E. class. But overall, pretty decent attempt, I think.
I really like getting it done first thing in the morning. Even though I was far from perfect, it made me feel a little bit strong when I started out the day feeling pretty weak. I woke up at 4 a.m. because one of my dogs was barking at nothing in particular, and I couldn't go back to sleep. Really with the alarm set for just about an hour later, what would have been the point anyway? Laying there, alone, waiting for the sun to rise, all you can really do is think. And sometimes thoughts can make you feel like you haven't made any real progress. You think you should be farther along in your journey than you are. And the fact that you're not, that you're still where you are, makes you wonder if you'll ever get there. Makes you question if you even want to get there.
Sometimes you can't control your thoughts. But you can control whether you get your butt out of bed and do something that isn't fun, doesn't come easy, makes you hurt, gets you stronger. And when you're done it won't matter if you're still where you are. You know you'll get there when you're ready.
Who knows why that guy had a band-aid on a leg that couldn't bleed...I can't imagine what it must be like to get used to living without one of your limbs. And this guy was doing more than just adapting. He was kicking some serious butt. With one original leg. I'm sure his journey, emotional and physical, to get to where he is today from whatever it was that caused him to lose his leg, was a long one. I'm sure he laid in bed in the early morning hours before the sun rose and wondered whether he'd ever feel like a whole person again. And I know without knowing a single other thing about this guy with the band-aid on his artificial leg that at some point he was ready.
Today I'm working on the strength to quit beating myself up for not being ready yet. It's called a journey for a reason. Just have to get up today and make today great. And not worry about where I'll be tomorrow. It may take 4 months or 4 years or forever, but I just have to keep going and eventually, I'll get there.
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